Disagreeing in Love
I read in the news recently that a well-known pastor and church had been disfellowshipped from their denomination because they ordained women pastors. In response, I am tempted to write an article urging my Stone-Campbell family that we should not also start dividing over those doctrines that are not salvation issues but should, instead, be faithful to our founding principles and work for the unity of the church.
But this is not that article, and I don’t know if it will ever be written. We are a free church movement. So, I won’t direct your feet, but I’ll tell you the path that I am on. If this invites anyone to walk with me, the more the merrier.
My steps have been captured by the slogan, “In essentials unity, in non-essentials liberty, and in all things love.” And this slogan is only worth saying if my essentials list is short. If I decide that all my convictions are essentials, then it would be simpler if I just didn’t use the slogan.
Colloquially, I say, “If we can arrive in eternity to find out which of us was right, then our disagreement might have been important, but it clearly wasn’t essential.” Less colloquially, my functional list of the essentials of faith is short:
- The identity and work of Jesus
- How we respond to Christ and the urgent need to do so.
- The authority of scripture as our rule for faith and practice.
That’s my list. It has been longer in some seasons but never shorter. This means that some important things aren’t on my list. This doesn’t mean those things aren’t important; it just means that they are not essential to faith in Christ. In particular, how we interpret scripture, even on very important matters, is not on my list.
Another slogan comes to mind that is an anchor for my ministry: “Where the Bible speaks, we speak. Where the Bible is silent, we are silent.” And if we are honest, we know that both parts of that commitment are difficult. Furthermore, I have found the need to add a third sentence, “Where the Bible is confusing, I am confused.” And this matters because often our areas of disagreement are in places where people are legitimately confused by the witness of scripture.
So, I can disagree with you on the role of women in the church and agree on the list of three, and not only will I not disfellowship you, I will cheer for the fruitfulness of your ministry to bring Christ to the world. We can disagree on how to interpret the creation narrative, and I will sing praise next to you and pursue mission with you and celebrate God’s work in your church and life. If we agree on the essentials, I’ll work and worship at your church even if we disagree on politics, Critical Race Theory, school vouchers, and weekly communion.
If we agree on the essentials, I’ll work and worship at your church even if we disagree on politics, Critical Race Theory, school vouchers, and weekly communion.
We can disagree on war and violence (which is likely because I’m basically a pacifist and we are out of fashion these days), and in that disagreement we will recognize that we are disagreeing about the most vital moral question a human will face: is it ever moral to take a life? And even in that disagreement, I won’t disfellowship you. I won’t even condemn you for supporting a theory of morally justified violence.
We could be worshipping in Rome and disagree on idol worship and Sabbath keeping (four out of ten of the Ten Commandments), and I would listen to Paul who says, “Who are you to judge someone else’s servant? To their own master, servants stand or fall. And they will stand, for the Lord is able to make them stand” (Romans 14:4). Did you hear that?! We are both going to stand even though one of us is surely wrong. Because our master Jesus Christ is able to make us stand. So, Paul says that how you interpret and apply the Ten Commandments are non-essentials, but trusting in Jesus to forgive you when you break them is an essential.
You may ask if I have opinions in these matters where Christians disagree today. I would not call them opinions; I would call them convictions. They are hard-fought, well-studied, and confidently-held. And if you let me buy you a biscuit at Bojangles, I will tell you why I hold these convictions so strongly. If you pay for the biscuit, you can tell me why I’m wrong. But what I will not do is claim that you are not my brother or sister in Christ or disfellowship you from my communion. If you are a child of God who has trusted in the same Jesus, responded to him in the same humble way, and are depending on God’s word, then you are my sibling in Christ, and we can celebrate together in our Father’s house.
And if you let me buy you a biscuit at Bojangles, I will tell you why I hold these convictions so strongly. If you pay for the biscuit, you can tell me why I’m wrong. But what I will not do is claim that you are not my brother or sister in Christ or disfellowship you from my communion.
I’m not saying you must do the same. I hope you will. I think that the mission Jesus gave us depends on it, but I can’t make you and I wouldn’t even try. I can’t make you because we have no voting body in our movement. It will never make the news when we disfellowship one another. There will be no ad campaign, or hotly contested election. There will merely be a few letters in our magazines and perhaps an angry and overly confident sermon at a conference followed by sadness as our fellowship breaks a bit more and the mission is weakened.
But even more than the fact that I can’t make you agree with me, I won’t even try to make you. You serve Jesus, not me. You must discern the path where he is leading you. When you hear a rumor that I encourage women to preach and have spent 25 years training them to do so, you can disfellowship, denounce, and look for other partners in ministry. I will understand. These are matters of biblical faithfulness to both of us. I do what I do because I believe God’s word demands it, and you’re doing that as well. So, I will understand if you decide to draw a line of fellowship that cuts me out, but I won’t do the same. I will still celebrate you and call you my brother or sister. My fellowship will still include you, even if yours doesn’t include me.
When you hear that I am persuaded of a traditional understanding of chastity and marriage, you can decide that I am too conservative or bigoted or old-fashioned. You can say that justice demands that you denounce me and pastors like me. Again, I understand, but I will not do the same. If you preach Christ and call people to trust in him alone for their salvation, I will be glad for your ministry, even if we disagree on a matter of serious moral consequence.
If you are a Republican, I am probably too liberal for you, and if you are Democrat, I am probably too conservative for you. If that means that you won’t worship with me or partner with me or link arms with me in mission, I understand (even though I think you have your kingdoms confused). But I want you to know that I will worship with you anywhere that the cross of Christ is proclaimed, the bread is broken, Christ is glorified, and the Bible is honored as the word of God.
But I want you to know that I will worship with you anywhere that the cross of Christ is proclaimed, the bread is broken, Christ is glorified, and the Bible is honored as the word of God.
And if you decide that you need a longer list of essentials so you only partner, bless, and fellowship with those who agree on ecclesiology, eschatology, pneumatology, and all the other ologies, that makes sense to me. And if that longer list means you need to leave someone out and even if that someone is me, no hard feelings. But I won’t join you. I will keep honoring, blessing, and celebrating your ministry even though I probably think you are wrong about some important stuff.
And I don’t plan to move from this position, for here I have planted my flag. If you preach Jesus – the only son of God and only savior of the world, who lived according to the scriptures, died and rose again according to scripture, and will return as the scriptures promise….If you teach that we must trust in him and repent of our sins and be baptized into Christ for the forgiveness of sin so that we me might be reconciled with God and that this is good news for us and for our children’s children’s children….And if you are seeking to obey scripture as your only rule for faith and practice, then I am on your team even when we disagree on how to interpret and apply God’s word in some very important areas.
That is the path I’m on. I invite anyone who is willing to join me there. If you can’t join me there, I understand. If you would like to tell me how wrong I am, I’ll be at the Bojangles at 2108 W. Mountcastle Dr. Johnson City TN. I’ll take a Sausage Egg and Cheese biscuit combo and a large Diet Pepsi.
Ethan Magness is an alum of Emmanuel Christian Seminary at Milligan. View Emmanuel’s Academic Programs page here.